Doom Report (Week 30: We Need a Sandwich-Proof Vest)

In what may be the weirdest story of the week, Jeanine Pirro, perhaps best known for being the drunk racist aunt of Fox “News” until she was appointed US attorney for DC, has declared that a man who threw a sandwich at an ICE officer will be charged with felony assault.  It is at this point in these reports that I would typically make a comment pointing out how ridiculous the previous sentence is.  In this case, however, I’m not sure I can enhance the inherent ridiculosity of the news story itself.  Best take: Brian Tyler Cohen and Glenn Kirschner, the latter of whom points out that the officer was wearing a bulletproof vest.  So I guess it could get more ridiculous, after all.

Other things you need to know this week:

• Adam Kinzinger’s back with another “week in review.”  His perspective as a sane Republican is an important one to have, I think.  If you want a deeper dive on his point that Ukraine is absolutely not losing the war, he has a good video on that too.  It gets a bit repetitive in places, but he also brings a perspective as a former military man—he was a fighter pilot longer than a Congressman—that’s quite incisive.

• If you want to understand the ongoing situation with the Texas Democrats and efforts to arrest them, Liz Dye has you covered over on Legal Eagle.

• Pod Save America’s Dan Pfeiffer interviews Gavin Newsom about ICE showing up at his press conference.

• BTC has what’s probably the best take on Trump’s cajoling for a Nobel Peace Prize.  He is, as always, a bit over the top in his liberal bias, but if you can look past that it’s an amusing summary of the situation.

One thing that I wish more of these shows would do is just take the time to go to Wikipedia.  For instance, both Some More News and Last Week Tonight have talked about former Lois & Clark actor Dean Cain apparently deciding to join ICE after a recruitment video of his went viral.  But neither of them noted the most insane part of the story: Cain’s birth name is Dean Tanaka, and members of his family were put into internment camps during WWII.  Apparently Margaret Cho picked up on the irony here, but no one else seems to have bothered to check the Wikipedia page, where you could have learned in about two paragraphs that Dean Cain is now in the Bizarro World position of having to arrest his own grandparents (figuratively speaking).  Cho nailed it when she said:

You have never been white, and no matter how many of these white activities you participate in, it’s never gonna make that happen.  No matter how racist you are.  No matter how wrong you act.  You will always be wrong—but never white.  Dumbass.

Over 30 years since her early stand-up days, but Margaret’s still got it.  Good to know she’s still out there serving up truth with a side of funny.